Confessions of a Cereal Lover

I have had many relationships in my life, but few have lasted longer than my love affair with cereal.

Obviously I’m not alone. The cereal aisle has multiplied many times over since my childhood, when we had about twenty cereal varieties to choose from. It seems like each week they introduced a new fruity sugary cereal, and if that one didn’t catch on, they would invent another one.  I probably learned to read by studying the back of those cereal boxes. I thought it must be cool to live in Battle Creek, Michigan, the home of Kellogg’s!

The shelves these days are dominated by the old favorites, but there are also plenty of “natural, organic, granola-based” cereals. I tried one of those, but it contained too much sawdust.

I’ve lived through two cereal eras in my life: sugar, and post-sugar. My mother sprinkled sugar on cereal, and I never complained.  I didn’t know there was any other way to eat it.  Soon after I got married, my wife caught me dumping a generous teaspoon of sugar on my corn flakes, and gave me that “look.” (I don’t have to explain the “look” to any married man reading this story.)

“Why are you doing that?” she asked.  “Because it’s cereal,” I replied. The “look” became more intense, and I got the message. Eventually I got used to her sugar-free mandate.

To this day, I’m still a serial cereal eater. What could be better? It requires no cooking skills, and if you add a little milk and fruit, it checks a lot of nutritional boxes.

I’m leaving out some obvious benefits, touched on by a few of my witty Facebook friends. For instance, Steve Plemmons is a longtime Grape Nuts nut. “Something in the way they move me,” he remarked quite subtly. Gail Walker prefers Raisin Bran, “which tastes good and helps in other ways too,” she said. I wonder what she means?

Honey Nut Cheerios is the number one seller nationwide, followed by Honey Bunches of Oats, with Frosted Flakes rounding out the top three.

As Tony the Tiger told us, Frosted Flakes are GRREEAT, and even Mom didn’t add sugar to those. In fact, some people don’t even add milk. Karen Tolbert said, “It’s like eating dry sugar,” and Allen Mincey said, “You can eat it out of the box as a snack, or even as dessert.”

For many of us, cereal takes us back to a special time and place, because we’re all kids at heart.  Lucky Charms will always be a favorite, because they’re “magically delicious,” like the leprechaun said.

Some folks who are old enough to know better still start their day with Capn’ Crunch, Boo Berry, Franken Berry, and Count Chocula.

“I’m a grandfather,” said Terry Wagnon, “but you can’t take the kid out of a man. I love Honey Smacks. Ever noticed they have a coffee smell?” Can’t say that I have, but I’ll savor the aroma next time.

Carmen Harvey said, “Cinnamon Toast Crunch is the best because my great-grandmother always had it when I was at her house to go to church.” Carmen, there’s no better reason to enjoy it.

Frosted Mini Wheats span a few generations as well. Flora Beaver said, “The wheat side makes the adult in me feel like it’s healthy, and the frosted side makes the kid in me very happy.” Linda Harris added, “I eat Frosted Mini Wheats with ice cubes, so the milk is extra cold!”

Some cereals even have a spiritual connection, according to Amy Bagley. She said, “The cereal sanctioned by God himself is Cheerios. I work in a church nursery, and it’s one of the only things we can give them!”

That is so true. I often wonder if the folks who clean out those cushioned church pews have their own ancient Cheerios collection. We found some under our sofa when our kids went to college.

My mom used to scold me when I didn’t want to drink the leftover milk. That’s not a problem for Amanda McClain, who loves Fruity Pebbles. “They are sweet and fruity, and the milk tastes great afterwards,” she said.

As for my personal favorite, it’s the old reliable.  Good old Kellogg’s Rice Krispies. They have truly lived up to their advertising. As my friend Brenda Latham said, “I have loved them forever. These days when I eat them, it sounds like me trying to stand up. Snap, crackle, pop!”