It’s April Fools Day, and thanks to all who sent in jokes!  Some of these are yours, and others are among my favorites.  Sabrina Cook, Robert Young and Marshall Nikowsky each win some fun gifts including Sonic gift cards and CDs from my prize closet.  Let’s have a laugh or five.

A couple from the country had never been to a big city, so they decided to take their son to New York and see the sights, like Rockefeller Center.  There they saw an imposing pair of metal doors with lighted numbers over them.  They wondered what in the world these metal doors could lead to.  An elderly, hunched-over lady hobbled past them, pushed a button next to the doors, they slid open and she hobbled in.  The doors shut, and the man and his son watched as the numbers went up, then down again.  A moment later, the doors slid open again, and a beautiful, sexy young woman walked out.  The man and his son stood there in stunned silence.  He then said to his son in a low voice, “Boy, go get your mother.”

A woman noticed she hadn’t seen her elderly neighbor in a few days so she called the police.  An officer came and searched the house, and, sure enough, the neighbor had apparently died peacefully in his sleep.  The coroner was called, and after an examination, the officer called the morgue to come retrieve the body.  The van driver at the morgue asked the officer exactly where the body was.  The officer looked out at the street signs and replied, “We’re at the corner of Hydrangea and Chrysanthemum.” “How do you spell that?” asked the van driver.  The officer thought for a moment, and then said, “How ’bout I drag the body over to the corner of Pine and Oak, and you can pick it up there?”

A local news reporter was interviewing an 80-year-old woman, who was getting married for the fourth time.  He asked her what if felt like to be marrying again at 80, and then about her new husband’s occupation. “He’s a funeral director,” she answered.  ‘Interesting,’ the newsman thought.  He then asked her if she wouldn’t mind telling him a little about her first three husbands and what they did for a living.   She paused for a few moments, needing time to reflect on all those years.  After a short time, a smile came to her face and she answered proudly, explaining that she’d first married a banker when she was in her early 20’s, then a circus ringmaster when in her 40’s, later on a preacher when in her 60’s, and now in her 80’s, a funeral director.  The interviewer looked at her, quite astonished, and asked why she had married four men with such diverse careers.  She smiled and explained, “I married one for the money, two for the show, three to get ready, and four to go!”