The cat is out of the bag. Many journalists are utilizing “A-I” to write stories. Occasionally I’m asked if I’m one of them.
If by “A-I,” you mean “average intelligence,” I might qualify for that. Like many folks, I’m curious about bots, ChatGPT, and all the other online entities that will supposedly make our lives easier.
So I found a writing app, entered some of my past columns, and instructed the non-human to “write a column about baseball in the style of David Carroll.” It spat out a few paragraphs that were not humorous or insightful in any way. That really got my attention. It was way too similar to something I could have written. Scary.
Recent headlines have also caught my eye. Like, “Kroger Cuts 3,000 Jobs as AI Reshapes Work.” Okay, this is getting serious. There are no Kroger stores in my neck of the woods, but when one big retail chain makes a move, the others could soon fall in line.
The story goes on to say that the Kroger layoffs are “part of a broader shift toward artificial intelligence and workflow streamlining.” That is usually code for “Good luck ever communicating with an actual person again,” but Kroger insists that “store-level and front line grocery workers are not part of this specific corporate reduction.” The message seems to be that fewer (corporate) employees will improve business efficiency.
That reminds me of my recent customer service call to a local heating and air company. I had called my usual “go-to” AC guy, but he was tied up that day, and I needed a cool breeze. So I tried another company, and I spoke to a lady for a minute or two, describing my cooling problems, and then sharing my address and phone number. I’m not the sharpest knife in the drawer, so it took me a while to realize that I was not speaking to a human being. Little Miss AI had charmed me into believing she was the real deal. She was so smooth and literate, that if I were single, I might have asked her out. I can’t remember what gave it away, but after a while, I realized that this “mom and pop” HVAC repair service had farmed out their receptionist service to AI, and I had been sharing my personal thermostat data with an uncaring figment of someone’s imagination. I hung up, and resumed my search for a person with an actual pulse.
Another news report indicated that I could soon have an “AI agent” to pay my bills, order items online, and remind me when it’s time to brush my teeth, watch a football game, or take a walk. Many similar devices are already available, and goodness knows that without my Google Maps app, I would often be driving in circles. But I’m not sure that I need an AI agent holding my hand through my mundane daily chores. Call me old-fashioned, but I should have to think for myself, at least once in a while.
Finally, I have been warned by USA Today to “Spot fake AI hotel reviews before booking a reservation.” Travel writer Christopher Elliott cited, “AI agents managed by reputation management firms.”
I didn’t even know that was a thing. I’m old enough to remember when a retail business had to provide a quality product in order to build and maintain a good reputation. It was called “word of mouth.” You do a good job and give your customer their money’s worth, and as word spreads, you earn a good reputation.
Not today. Many hotel reviews are AI generated, and (spoiler alert) many of them are fake five-star exclamations of praise. “Excellent service!” “Attentive staff!” “Best bed ever!” And so on.
I prefer real reviews written by real people. You can spot them if you try. “If you love powdered eggs, you’ll love the free breakfast bar.” “Would it hurt them to dust the rooms every year or so?” And, “Thanks for giving me the room next to the world’s loudest ice machine. I didn’t need to sleep anyway.”
Welcome to the AI world. Don’t believe everything you read. Except for this column, of course.
